Life.

Originally I was going to create a post on my trip to Dublin a couple weeks ago - but I decided I wanted to talk about something different today.

Life - it's a crazy journey. It's full of ups and downs. When I was a freshman in college wanting to study abroad at some point in my career at Hanover, I dreamed about it being the best semester of my life. I'd get to travel, I'd get to live in Europe, everything would be fabulous for the 5 months I was abroad.

In reality - this truly has been the best semester of my life...but not in the ways you'd think. This semester has challenged me not only academically, but individually. In the short time I have been here, I have never learned so much about myself. It's been one of the hardest semesters, but I know I will come out more sure of myself than I ever have before.

Being away from all my friends and family back home, every decision I make is up to me, and solely me. While I can consult friends and family on the phone every once in awhile, it's ultimately myself who calls all the shots. It's been a semester of doing things for me, and only me.

Let me tell you, it isn't always easy being on your own. Often I find myself missing people back home, and it only becomes harder when you FaceTime and talk to them on the phone only to realize you aren't going to see them face to face for another few months. The glamour of studying abroad can wear off and the realities of stress and struggles can set in and eat you alive.

I'm guilty of thinking about the future too often rather than living in the present. I've caught myself multiple times dreaming about life at Hanover in the fall where I'll be back working with Panhellenic Council, playing tennis, working on my theses. The comfort feels nice. I love thinking about being back with friends and how I will be back in a world where I can understand what everyone is saying around me, where my beautiful little campus makes me smile from cheek to cheek on gorgeous fall days, where everything feels natural.

But I already know once I'm back I'm going to be wishing for the days where I could step out of the door of Junior House just to walk down the street to grab some of the best waffles you'll ever eat, where I can study in my favorite coffee shop, where I can hop on a train in minutes and go explore the world. This experience has taught me to truly appreciate living in the moment. It's easy to think about where you'll go next, but why do that when there is so much to experience now?

I'm still learning how to be with myself along the way. Last week, I had a phone call with someone I truly look up to who sat me down **virtually** and said "hey, you're homesick, and that's totally okay". At Hanover, it's easy for me to get caught up in all my activities on top of schoolwork. Because I haven't had this here, in many ways it feels like I've lost my purpose. Instead, I've decided to take a challenge. I'm learning how to embrace being alone with myself, letting my mind roam free, and taking more time to figure out who I am. It's been one of the best things for myself.

As I said before, I wouldn't trade studying abroad for the world. I have been blessed to see so many new places and to meet new people that have made this experience the best it can be. Along the way, I'm learning more about myself than I ever have before, and I'm loving it. I don't want to think about leaving in June, but I know how excited I will be to return to my favorite place in the world in September, rejuvenated and refreshed - ready to take on senior year.

If you've made it this far . . . thank you for listening. More travel posts will be up soon, I promise! Until next time.